Date of Conferral

2022

Degree

Ph.D.

School

Counselor Education and Supervision

Advisor

Melinda Haley

Abstract

Counselor education lacks representation and visibility of Black women and women of color scholars and professionals despite ongoing efforts to promote cultural diversity and inclusion within the field. Researchers have explored the externalized stereotypes of identity for Black women; however, little is known about the internalized beliefs of these stereotypical identities and the impact on advocacy and (un)wellness in academic settings. The purpose of this critical autoethnography was to present an insider’s view of a Black woman’s nuanced experiences of internalization of stereotypes while completing a counselor education doctoral program. Using an endarkened feminist onto-epistemological framework to guide the research, data collection included personal (re)collections, artifacts, and two storyteller interviews compiled into critical tales to illustrate generational knowledge of Black womanhood, education, spirituality, and social justice. The following themes emerged from a meta-analysis: (a) (re)defining wholeness of identity, with three subthemes, honoring generational wisdom, witnessing maternal resilience, and (re)securing a sense of belonging; (b) (re)engaging advocacy as an expression of spirituality, with two subthemes, reconciling generational advocacy and negotiating the politics of spirituality; and (c) (re)learning endarkened joy through creative expression, with two subthemes, enduring the process of looking inward to find truth and expressing truth in safe spaces as a practice of wellness. The findings in this study offer critical and analytical interpretations that have implications for increasing culturally congruent advocacy practices of resistance and wellness to promote positive social change.

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